Friday, November 09, 2007

joie de vivre

In keeping with the theme of my tryst with destiny...oops, diseases every 15 months, here is the story of what can be euphemestically termed as "an experience which has made me mentally stronger". It started off with typhoid one fine March morning in the year of 2005; a severe bout of jaundice followed last year and then some disease last month too long (Say X) to be committed to memory. In hindsight, I don't know what afflicted me . Not to speak of the various bouts of fever, cold (common and not so common), amoebiosis and you will begin to get the picture of quite an exhaustive list.

Each one has been an 'enriching' and enjoyable period of time where I have had to do nothing sans eat, sleep and of course watch Liverpool get beaten. They have been ominous too for if jaundice struck me on my 20th birthday, my first surgery courtesy Mr. X happened "at the stroke of midnight" of my sister's 16th birthday
as Nehru would put it. It has also enhanced my respect for the healthcare facilities in Varanasi. If jaundice made the docs feel that I was having a viral, Mr.X was diagnosed as a petty insect bite. If I were Sir Sunderlal, I wouldn't be visiting Sir Sunderlal Hospital any longer for personal healthcare.

Mr. X was the result of months of perseverance and sweat literally. It was some strange sort of fluid accumulation near my spine which didn't grant me the luxury of sitting, standing or sleeping. Life can be quite interesting in such situations when you spend considerable amount of time trying to optimize posture and pain. When the pain made me wonder whether it was an insect bite or an insect, I made the trivial mistake of visiting some King Edwards Memorial hospital in Mumbai during my Dussehra hols, a hospital which made me wonder whether we still lived in the days of colonialism. I have often believed that Government hospitals are hybrids between jails and asylums. You are held captive and finally you go insane. Much the same happened with me as I was operated upon without getting myself mentally prepared nor knowing about the status of the Liverpool game that night. Needless to say, the operation was an unqualified disaster and all it left me with was an ellipse with major axis far greater than the minor axis with a depth of 5 cms near the bottom of my spine. (I have been reading Geometry of late for CAT).

After two unsuccessful attempts in getting me to sit, my parents decided that home had to be the remedy for this. I didn't mind it too much for this meant that I was going to be able to fly business class at last though I was quite miffed at the choice of airlines.

I am still to fly by Kingfisher.

The flight was the most torturous two hours I had had. I wriggled myself into a ball on the seat and had at least 5 protective cushions. The menu was quite exotic but all I was supposed to have was 'cut fruits'. I tried hard to convince my parents that eating nothing constituted a significant drain of resources, but when pain becomes considerably greater than greed, you are forced to optimize better.


Trivandrum was funny because the doc felt that I didn't require any anaesthasia for my second surgery and I was smiling after my operation much to the dismay of my parents. I bet I woke up everyone in the hospital during that operation. Now this left me with a cuboid with length considerably greater than breadth and roundabout the same depth. Another week passed off in hospital in which I counted 103 injections when I was awake. Worse, the doc kept pulling my leg asking me to quantify my pain. My yells grew progressively shriller as a consequence.

Now, back to campus and the problems are much the same. Attendance, tests and assignments give me a feeling of deja vu. India and Liverpool continue to play poorly; Dravid continues to be treated badly and I am still lazy. But being able to stand, sit and sleep I guess is a considerable improvement. CAT has become an acronym for Come Another Time and I quite fancy my chances of becoming a medico if denied an engineering degree. My senses have dulled; my verbatim is just a fraction of my old self as you would have noticed throughout this post but I still for some inexplicable reason am back to my cheerful best. A word of thanks to all my friends who were with me through what was undoubtedly the toughest 20 days of my life. Meanwhile, I await my next tryst with destiny.




26 comments:

Unknown said...

I guess that the ellipse is not an "ellipse" ,it is an ellipsoid.
You know i figured that Mr.X out in my imagination.So, think before you write that real.

Unknown said...

hmm...i just hope that these creative musings about a time of considerable physical pain have been done in retrospect, because while everyone loves a person who is so 'zindadil', but in this case you'll sort of lie on the intersection of masochism and insanity. Get well soon paape...

By the way..engaging stuff..but then this statement must be like a omni-known (why is that not a word when the meaning is so clear) platitude in varun's blog.

wolverine said...

dude. i admire ur ability to make light of even the most serious things in life!. dunno wat else to say...

do get well man!

Anonymous said...

Now that you are walking around or rather limping around it is time for that lecture on personal hygiene and importance of bathing regularly...hahaha...
anyway, it is great to have you back although you aren't particularly useful staying a mile away from the rest of us

Poorva said...

Awaiting the next tryst?? I sincerely hope this was the last one...

Carpe Diem :).

Anonymous said...

I second your opinion on Sir Sunderlal and his Hospital .. though couldn't have jested it as well as you did ...
and your senses haven't dulled to a bit :)
your hostel mates miss you a lot ... come back soon

Anonymous said...

Its nice to have you back, supporting Everton isn't the same if there are no Reds around.

Ravi Bansal said...

This post had the same wit and humour that accompanies an Akshay Rajagopalan, to go with the masterful writing skills of a Varun Murali. Who said your senses have dulled??

Seriously pray that this was the last time you had to face such a tryst with destiny.

crazy devil said...

hehehe disasters meeting a brat and see what we have got..a beautiful blog..I m in dilemma whether to wish you get well soon or to wait for prettier blogs..
wish indian sports clicks to abate ur pains

Akshay Rajagopalan said...

Wonderful article, man. Pain and disease doth not have the balls to screw your pen (the pen that uses ink)

Varun Murali said...

@Srikant:
I guess that is why CAT will remain an unfulfilled ambition this year. Reading geometry and can't quite get an ellipsoid right.

@Shivam:
I didn't find life one bit funny then. You must have slogged very hard for GRE to speak with such authority on the existence of words!

Varun Murali said...

@wolverine:
I guess you ain't going to get better faster by sulking. You bet I will be back to my valli self!

@anonymous aka paddy:
Am currently on a 25 day streak and was on a 30 day streak prior to that :-( All can do is thank gmail.

Anonymous said...

what an eventful life man? i think i am beginning to envy you... :-)
good post by the way, i still suggest you try out that autobiography...
one more thing, your post has helped me confirm one thing for me from my response to it; that i have move on from being philosophical to being heartless when it comes to life. whence i can't bring myself to console you in your hour of distress my dear friend!!! sigh.........

Shivansh said...

I don't have words to do justice to your magnificent post...

Don't worry about ellipsoid, CAT(Come another time) doesn't have 3D geometry...and is raring to catch you by the scuff of your neck(similar to what you have done to your pain with your words)...

By the way...I am disappointed on one count that you didn't make a mention of the Air hostess helping you with your **s...Didn't she told you " Sir, the seats of our airliner are very soft and comfortable..it won't be a problem..."

Varun Murali said...

@poorva:
I guess I was just speculating about the future based on past records. Very aptly put. Especially when you have a none too inspiring future and a very troubled past.

@abhinav:
Poor old BHU! I miss you guys more, mate!

@ravi:
I take the poetic acclaim with all humility. Though I must admit your thoughts tend to provoke me as I read your blog

Varun Murali said...

@ankit:
We will renew our duels next semester; a year which should see Liverpool win a treble :-)

@rahul:
You seem to feel my 'pulse' best. Cricket isn't the same without the 'wall'.

@Akshay:
Ravi seems to have annoyed you. I am silent

Varun Murali said...

@Arjun:
You are sick, man! Just waiting to get more content for my autobiography. It shall be a layman's guide to becoming a doctor.

@Shivansh:
See why I missed Kingfisher!

Kapil said...

ab hum kaa bataaen bhaiya... eee jo laundwaa hain naaa...eeeka bas ek hi piraablom hain....badi gandagi main rahita hain bechaara...mahino mahino tak nahaata naaahi hain... kamra dekhliyo to lagta hain ki abhi abh katrina maar gayi ho inka...(arey woh katrina naaahi...hum bush waali ki baat karat hain...)

Chaukhta dekho lo inka...to aisa lagega...jaise kauno dushmani ho inkaaa apne aap ka accha dekhne main...badi badi daadhi...jaisan ki woh pakistaani baalebaaj hain naa...kaa naam hian uska..yousuf...usi ki tarah laagat hain eee...inka baal to jaise kauno burush ho...
aur bimaari to bhaiya ee dhoond dhoond ke laawat hain.... kauno naarmal bimaari to hot hi naahi inkaa... jaun jaun bimaari superman ke abaajaan ko hot raahi..usshi sab inko hot baa...
hum to keh keh ke pareshaan ho chuke hain...aur tumahidekh lo..bhai..

Anonymous said...

For once it was quite heartening to see someone who could jest at his own misfortunes so lightly, and i liked the way you put it- as "an experience which has made me mentally stronger".

Unknown said...

You missed a chance to attract sympathy by making a humorous blog out of a DD mega serial-like tale. Anyways great to know that you still havent lost your jovial self.

keralafarmer said...

Come and join with Malayalam Bloggers. A meet at Trivandrum was on 10 th November 2007. Visit this blog in Malayalam

Pallindrome said...

I had a similar tryst towards the end of the first year.....2 surgeries, 6 months of daily bandages....and yes..the doctor i first met didn't mind piercing the wound six inches deep without anesthesia...I know what exactly u went through mate...

Rahul Priyedarshi said...

"my verbatim is just a fraction of my old self as you would have noticed throughout this post"

petty little Mr X can torment u physically but he can't take ur mental faculties away from u mate..on the contrary to what u have said this post testifies that.
Get well soon..

The Furobiker said...

dude.. time to post abot CATastrophe

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